The Fear Of Asking Questions

Do you have a fear of asking questions?  Some of these questions can be simple things, like asking your server what they recommend.  Or the fear of asking to take something off of your order.  You become self-conscious and think you’re being too picky.  If you’re going to go out and pay for food then why not get what you want?  Of course, don’t be a snob about it.  

That’s just a really simple example, but not conquering your fear can effect your life in a much bigger way.  Rather than being afraid to ask somebody for something, think about what you might be losing out on.  Turn the fear into power.  Financially, you may be losing out on a lot.


Fear of calling your cable company.  

call your cable company

Companies that offer deals to bring you in as a customer are there to lure you in.  Of course, after the promotional period is over they raise your monthly bill.  Now you’re stuck with a big bill and there’s nowhere to turn – or is there?

Call the company up after the promotional period and see if they can give you a new promotion or renew the previous.  A lot of companies are willing to do what it takes to keep a customer.  Companies don’t want to lose your business.  A lot of the time they will give you a break if you just call and ask.

They’re counting on that you don’t.


Fear of calling your bank.

credit card fees

Have you ever gotten fees from your bank for overdrafts or credit card fees for late payments?

I have!

Don’t just sit and think that there’s nothing you can do about it.  As long as it’s not a common theme, if you call up the bank and ask for them to waive the fee, it’s likely they will.  I’ve actually done this a few times over the years.  Sometimes those late payment fees are expensive!  Why pay a $50 late fee if all you had to do was make a phone call to make it disappear?


Fear of asking for a raise. 

talking to your bank

Think about what that can cost you because you’re afraid to approach your boss.  I’ve beaten out plenty of people smarter than myself purely because they didn’t think they were worthy of a raise or were too afraid to ask for one.  This year, I received the largest raise I’ve ever had all because I just asked.

I didn’t complain about the pay I was getting.  It was good. 

I wasn’t demanding a giant rate increase (since I’m a contractor).  I just asked if they could do better.  They said yes.  

In fact, I didn’t even have to give a number.  They gave me a fair offer and I accepted.  

Ask yourself, what’s the worst that can happen?  If an employer values you and the work you do they aren’t going to be offended.  The worst they can say is no.  If you’re helping them make money, it’s likely they will reward you for it.

Forbes shares 8 ways to ask for a raise and get it.  

Imagine that you decided not to ask for a raise.  Let’s say your employer would have given you a $5k bump in salary.  That five thousand dollars can resonate throughout the rest of your career.  Depending on how early you are in your career, missing out on five thousand dollars every year for the rest of your career could cost you immensely.

Over a 30 year period, that would have cost you 1/2 a million dollars had you invested it.  Don’t be afraid to ask.

Related: How I doubled my salary in less than a year

Turn the fear into power!

At this point, I think you’re understanding the theme.  In this day in age, people are afraid to even pick up the phone.  They’d rather handle things online.  The thing is, there’s nothing that beats talking to a human in person.  I’ve gotten jobs by just walking into places to see if they were hiring.

Money isn’t the end all be all, but why lose out on years of your life because you were afraid to ask a few questions?  Those couple of questions could have helped you retire years early or made life quite a bit easier.

Some ways to mitigate your fear:

  • Get to know your boss a little better before asking for that raise.
  • Ask your friends questions and carry that momentum to the person you actually want to ask.
  • Remember what it costs to not ask.  Asking is usually better than not asking.
  • Ask yourself why your so afraid to ask?  Rejection is okay – we learn from it.

Questions are powerful and so are you if you know how to ask them.


Do you have a fear of asking questions? 
Have you ever saved money or received a raise and almost didn’t ask?  


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